Not only sex: the expert told why moistening and erection are not equal to desire to have sex
It was told by gestalt therapist Oksana Rovnaya, who works with the sexuality thematic.
As the expert confirms, on the whole noncordance shouldn’t be new to people . Sexologists have spoken and taken into account its role for many years. This phenomenon has passed through many thorough investigations, but in our country most people still open this thematic for themselves, some with easement and some with protest: “How can it be?”.
The expert says that noncordance is an ordinary phenomenon and is not considered a problem.
According to the investigations, which were conducted in the book written by Emily Nagosky, an expert in the field of sex education, who has 20-year work experience, the representatives of the stronger sex have the genital response equal to 50% and in half of the cases the frequency of blood flow to the penis is the same as an excited man feels himself. And with us, ladies, the percent of the coincidence is very low, about 15%.
For example, let’s consider the long suffering 50 shades of grey: in the first chapter Christian puts his fingers into Anasteishn’s vagina and says: “Look, how your body like it, you are moistening, switch off your head!”.
It is an “attractive” theory as if the body demonstrates our secret sexual liberty, which is ready to agree to everything if we only give ourselves a permission, - said everywhere. And rather a harmful myth still inculcates. And only this myth made me feel many times that there was something wrong with me and in rare cases something wrong with my guy: “He has an erection, but he doesn’t want intimacy, how it can be?! He took offence with me; I should learn why and thoroughly screw his brains out”.
“He has a soft penis and he says he wants me, he tells lies not to offend me, he doesn’t want me or he has problems with his health”.
As the specialist remarks that an erection doesn’t show interest: morning erection doesn’t show desire to have sex.
“In some cases an orange is just an orange, and very often an orgasm and ejaculation happen without an erection, and in this case the absence of an erection shows that the level of testosterone is low, but not that there is no excitement. And these are bright examples of noncordance in men. And vice versa, if a lady is “dry”, but she says she wants intimacy, you should believe her and use a lubricant and not to say that it is something unnatural, actually you don’t want me and tell lies not to offend me. And if a lady is damp, but she says “no”, - believe her. You shouldn’t use this well-known method in reality – you want, but you suppress your own wishes, you should learn to ask, listen and hear”, - the psychologist advises.
The source https://sexabudhabi.mobi/
